Why don't you ever wear dresses?
If you are that lesbian who likes to carry a masculine personality, then you must have encountered this particular question a lot of times by people around you, almost every single day. So, how do you feel when someone asks you to shift into those fashion statements which you never understand and never get into? This question may seem simple but indeed it's a tough question to answer, actually no tomboy or butch lesbian likes to respond to this question because of the microaggressive aspect.
There is no rule that every girl must dress up in a completely girly way to portray one's feminine personality. Lesbians are stereotypically considered as women who dress up bold and their fashion choices speak the volumes of masculinity. Some categories of lesbians are mostly based on their dressing choices and behavioral patterns. If you have a typical lesbian pal, you understand the drill around their styling statements.
Most of the lesbians have their signature fashion outfits. Some opt for monochromatic looks, some go with single-color blocks, some fill their wardrobes with either white or completely black, some love to just shop the pieces of denim, some maintain the typical male collection of blazers, trousers, and shirts, some only wear one kind of checked or striped shirts, some are mostly into office wear or formal wear, some always carry business looks no matter what, some only carry their personalities in shorts and sleeveless vests. One can find most of the lesbians in typical male attires (according to the typical societal dress codes).
But that's partially realistic. Another set of lesbians are always seen in the typical feminine wear like dresses, skirts, stockings, cocktail gowns, and all the heavy ethnic wear. The funny part is, society finds it hard to believe a girl in typical feminine wear to be a lesbian, and ironically, people still question all the so-called masculine-fashion opted lesbians regarding their choice of not opting for dresses! It's so ridiculously confusing.
Why should a girl constantly wear a dress to portray one's femininity? No one has laid a rule for a girl to opt for one's fashion choices according to those old typical dress codes. Even in this Gen X era, society still throws the microaggression towards lesbians and their fashion choices. People ask this particular question in a very casual, sweet, and melting manner. Some even add a little fake concern to put a girl under some societal pressure to think about one's fashion statements.
It's high time for all the lesbians out there to raise their voices against this absurd and naive question. Instead of overlooking it with a random answer or convincing others or promising others to get into typical feminine wear, try to stand for yourself, for your fashion choices, and mostly for your dressing freedom. In the queer community, dressing is not about covering naked bodies, it's unleashing one's originality, one's rawness, and one's sexuality.
Society has already laid a typical definition for lesbian girl fashion choices and if you get along with those choices and if you feel comfortable in carrying outfits that elevate your lesbian standards, stick to them even though the people around you pose a question that contradicts the typical lesbian fashion statements.
Society always does this shit. It assumes something. It expects something. If that assumption and expectation don't match, it contradicts its assumption and expectation just to put a person under its pressure. Don't fall in this loop. Next time if someone asks you why you don't ever wear dresses, tell them that the dresses aren't made for you and they can never carry you. And if still the person forces you and irritates you with the same question, pull him or her to the most expensive store and ask him or her to buy you a brand-new cocktail gown which is way out of his or her affordability. Crush that microaggression with your handling abilities so that next time the person who poses you this particular senseless question shouldn't bother others!
