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"When you find the One"...

Do you think everything changes when we find that one person in our lives as a partner? Do you think whoever steps in our life can change every single aspect? Is it possible to change the sexual orientation of a person by his/her partner? Unfortunately, the One person whom we think can fill our lives, can never get into the mind and change the way how we get attracted to people.

Asexuality is all about having zero opinions on sexual attractions and it is very hard to believe and understand when they come out as asexuals saying that they are completely disinterested in having sexual attractions. People, hardly listen to them and consider their feelings. The words of an asexual person always get a strike off when it comes to sexual life discussions. To the world, which runs on lusty affairs, understanding the concept of love without lust is hard to digest.

And this is the very reason, asexuals feel uncomfortable, unsafe and misunderstood whenever they open up about their feelings. Because, whenever they say that they can never have sexual attractions towards another person, people start giving unnecessary suggestions without properly understanding the mainstream of asexuality by simply spilling the common statement "When you find the One".

So, now think about it, what big change can happen in the life of an asexual when he/she finds the one of his/her life? Of course, there can be many changes except for one thing, sexual attraction. Because it is the same as a sexually active person. Imagine you are a sexually active person, from any of the orientations. And by God's grace, you find the one whom you think will complete the meaning of your life. What if that same person approaches you by saying not to have sexual attractions towards him/her and can never involve in sex with you? So, what you will do? Will you become an asexual person for the sake of that one person?

You can hardly give a second thought about it and soon after your so-called "the One" utter these words, you would be already thinking to get away from him/her. It is the same thing with an asexual person because at the end of the day, they are humans and they too have feelings and emotions. Like, how your sexual attractions play an important role in getting attracted to others, the same sexual attractions play no role in the life of an asexual. Try to understand this small point which brings out the huge change in spilling worthless statements that degrade the power of orientation.

The sick part is, asexuality is one of the orientations included in the queer community, but still people have zero knowledge about how an asexual person works with his/her sexual attractions. Instead of supporting, accepting and understanding the feelings of an asexual person, many of us ask them to calm down, relax and think about their feelings and emotions. This is unfair. What if someone asks you to check yourself twice when you talk about how you feel about yourself and your orientation? You will be surely raged.

Why people get so shocked and surprised hearing when someone says that love with sex exists too? Well, if you think sex makes a relationship complete, then you are surely a sex maniac. Making love is the ultimate portrayal of love for people who get attracted to each other physically and sexually. Being in love without getting into each other physically, is the ultimate thing to showcase the love among asexuals. It's that simple. And there is no need for feeling shocked about it. Well, do you sleep with every person you like and love? Hope you understand the point.

Yes, asexuals too can get into relationships and can love each other forever. They can find the one in their life and live happily ever after without getting sexually attracted to each other. Because that's what their whole orientation is all about and it is quite normal. When an asexual finds the one in his/her life, it clearly says that "the One" person he/she finds must be an asexual. Well, that's how like mindsets sink into each other and start loving and sharing whole life right?

People of different sexual orientations work in the same way when it comes to love. The feelings, emotions, pain and pleasures, every aspect is the same with different modes. Observe the normality of orientation and understand your fellow person's feelings like how you care and bother about yours. When you connect with a person so deeply, do you think sex matters the most? And do you think every single couple in this world is in love only with sexual attractions to each other?

Asexuality works without sexual attractions, even though an asexual person may or may not find the one, he/she remains the same. Period.

#everydayqueerlife #towardslove #asexualblogs #asexuality #lovelife

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