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Ways to mend gender dysphoria in your queer kids!

First and foremost, mending gender dysphoria is not at all about trying to pressurize your queer kid towards conversion therapy. That's some ridiculous bullshit and you should under no circumstances execute that. Moreover, it is all about repairing the confused thoughts of your queer kid regarding one's gender and get your kid out of the struggling dilemma regarding the validation of one's gender. Queer kids from the age of 11 to 18 typically feel gender dysphoric. Broadly, people think that every transgender kid feels that way, but it is wrong. Some queer kids are smart enough to realize their orientations and identities and can easily come over various struggles but a few queer kids including homosexuals and bisexuals, fall into the trap of this dysphoric darkness and struggle hard to get rid of it.

Hence, you as parents or siblings of a queer kid, need to observe and focus on how your kid responds to one's gender and regulates the symptoms of gender dysphoria. Parents must look at how a queer kid is behaving in various environmental conditions, be it at home, in public, at school, in private, while mingling with other kids, while shopping, even while walking. Every single detail must be noted to let your kid grasp and accept the concept of gender.

It all starts with simple nouns and pronouns. If your kid keeps insisting you constantly alter his name to something related to the opposite gender, then you must understand that he is quite uncomfortable in carrying a completely masculine name and he needs everyone to call him with a typical feminine name. Naturally, most kids don't like their names and they always tend to like other kids' names but in the case of queer kids who struggle with gender dysphoria, they don't want others to call them names which they don't feel related to, at all.

This scenario can be envisioned soon after a kid comprehends the grammatical changes in any language, especially in masculine and feminine concepts. The education system specifies, male and female in every subject and when a queer kid feels that he or she is being considered as the wrong gender, then everything becomes difficult and disturbance for a queer kid to understand the situation around him/her. For instance, if a girl invariably gets chosen to play indoor games by her classmates and teachers even though she wants to play basketball with boys outdoors so badly, that girl's inner psychology gets affected and it keeps questioning her regarding her assigned gender and the gender she likes to be referred to.

The typical gender binary constitutes the key reason behind the gender dysphoria in any queer kid. Due to these restrictions in society, queer kids fall into confusion and they start treating themselves wrong especially when they notice other kids performing things exactly the opposite but still get treated normally by people around. A queer kid feels utterly disappointed when he/she behaves in the way he/she likes but gets treated as if it is abnormal, dissimilar, and invalid.

To clear the confusion, parents who understand and recognize the queerness of their kids must step into the scenario to get everything proper to provide a queer kid, a clear perspective towards one's gender. Most kids spend time outside, at school or playgrounds, or with friends, hence, it becomes challenging for a parent to know inside out of a queer kid. So, a parent needs to spare some time to know the daily routine and inquire about any disturbances in one's routine, especially when it comes to gender, bullying, and doubts regarding one's existence.

  • Tell your kid that it is completely okay to be confused and give an assurance that everything is going to be fine and clear soon.

  • Engage your kid to understand that he is queer but it is completely normal to be queer.

  • Talk about genders and open the mindset of your queer kids by introducing them to non-binary gender terms and explain them clearly, so that they can relate to themselves.

  • Ask and respect your queer kid's choices in every aspect, be it in studies, in games, in shopping.

  • Choose the pronouns your queer kid like to be referred to, even though his or her physical transition is yet to be done. (transgender kids)

  • And most importantly, prepare your queer kids to understand that names and pronouns aren't a person's complete identity. Make them focus on their personalities and building up a broad mindset in which everything that doesn't hurt is acceptable.

  • Never restrict in making them watch television shows they like to watch and the characters they feel like getting into. The more restrictions you lay, the more dilemma your kid falls into.

  • Ask your kid to explain how he or she feels and make him or her enlighten you with their emotions. With this, you can see the connections, clarity, and confusion in your queer kid.

  • Instead of proving that your kid is wrong, explore what is right by being together.

  • Never include religion, society, spirituality, prestige, social status while discussing your kid's personality. This may make them feel invalid, and they never open up.

  • Even though you are distressed in knowing unpredictable facts about your queer kid, always try to suppress it with a smile and never expose your fear, disgust, shame, an embarrassment in front of him or her. Well, there is nothing to feel in such a way indeed.

  • Be a parent who positively and healthily encourages instead of ruining your queer kid's life with unbearable discouragement.

  • Never use obscene, demeaning, and degrading language to devalue your queer kid's gender. It has a deeper impact and your queer kid may feel bad about both his or her assigned gender and the gender he or she likes to be referred to.

  • If possible, take your queer kid to the right psychologist who deals with gender dysphoria. It helps your kid to feel safe and secure in opening up one's feelings and emotions.

Your every step towards clearing the gender dysphoria helps your queer kid find the right path to traverse without any discrepancies and disturbances in life. Whatever the gender it might be, a queer kid must realize one's gender identity to have proper clarity towards one's likes, dislikes, preferences, and tastes. Your support, acceptance, and encouragement make things fall in the right place and it truly helps your queer kid to remain queer and proud!

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