Tips to come out clear as a Queer Couple!
Queer always remain strange no matter how forward we fight for the normality of it. And queer couples are either getting mistaken or be treated as friends for the rest of the society especially to parents. A homosexual couple must always strive hard to come out individually and also come out as a couple. It would be easy if the families of the couple don't know each other, but it becomes harder for the families who know each other so much. Because, that's where the complexities in the society arises according to them.
And most importantly, coming out as a queer couple, always have its own good and bad consequences which may lead to a drastic change in the couple's lives. So, before coming out as a couple, the partners must be aware of all the situations, the right time and the right way of approaching people to convince them for their acceptance. Some bold people don't give a damn about people's acceptance. But not everyone can be courageous enough to go against the whole world right. Hence, most of the queer couples in India, try to convince their kin and kith to accept them as partners for life. To make it happen, a couple must follow few things to play it safe to reduce the level of damage to a great extent.
Talk about your partner most of the times, mostly in good times. Take him/her as a perfect example for the perfect situation in your family get reunions or any friendly gatherings. Don't over do. Just hit the right points. So, the people with you can clearly know how important is that person is for you and also that makes them think that you know a whole about your partner.
Take your partner to your most important family events and introduce him/her to your whole family. Let them know the place of that particular person in your life.
And when you are introducing yourself to each others families, do not think about impressing people. That surely ends you up faking your own personality and also leads to a big mess. Be yourself and talk how you normally talk to strangers in a respectful way. There is no rule that you must be liked by a bunch of people at their first sight. So, take a chill pill and try to make them accept you as YOU.
Show the subtle display of affection publicly in front of your families and friends. Don't hesitate to care each other just because you are with your people. Show love and be protective of each other. Because, that's when people get to know that you really care for each other no matter what the world thinks about you.
A little faking for the sake of acceptance from people is totally suggested. Because, you can't be like a flashy gay guy in front of your partner's family members. Just reduce your gay aura because there are chances where people feel awkward. In India, it's quite common.
And that doesn't mean you must act totally different. It's like attending an interview, bit formal, bit classy, bit ethical and a lot of transparency. That's what people want at the end of the day.
Impressions are always fluctuating. So be stable in the way you are. Who knows people who denies you may accept you later. Generally, this happens with Indian mothers. So, everyone else is one side and your partner's mother will be on the other side. So, give her a hope that you both can do wonders together without any discrepancies in life.
The concept of homosexuals is mostly treated as a taboo and people hardly have any knowledge about it. So enlighten them by portraying the normality of your relationship through your love and affection for each other.
After your trials to impress each others families for their acceptance, find a perfect time and the perfect place to come out as a couple. Because coming out suddenly can create a lot of ripples in your relationship with your friends and families. Prepare them for the day in a way that they would say that they expected it in before hand before you spill it out. In that case, the damage levels can be low.
People get irritated when they come to know about your relationship from someone else other than you. Because, everyone expects their son/daughter/friend to reveal about their relationship to their close people. So, never make them know about your relationship with your partner from any outsider.
Arrange a good lunch or dinner and gather all your family members and your closest pals together to come out as a couple. Do not announce it when everyone is having their good time having food. Take a stand for yourself, take a deep breath and ask everyone for their attention and just say that you love the person whom you are talking more about. Tell them that you want to be with them at any cost. Just express your every feeling regarding your relationship and how much you care the acceptance of your family and friends. Let them know their place in your life.
At first, people may burst out like hell, but they surely consider your emotions, feelings and the value you give for their acceptance of your relationship. At the end of the day, people who want to stay in your life, will stay at any cost and you don't have to feel bad about people who leave you.
Keeping your family and friends in your mind by giving them the importance of accepting your relationship, always helps a queer couple to survive in a good place without any disturbances. As a queer couple, gather all the strength to face your families and friends to say what you are and how you wanted to be. Rest, everything will go with the flow. You must have a hope for a better life regardless all the hurdles you face in the process of coming out clear as a Queer couple!
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