Assumptions hardly turn out to be a reality; feelings may throw us into a dilemma of reality whereas reality makes sure everything is strictly real and inescapable from a person or a situation. Assuming your partner's outshining behavior is different from feeling the same and in meanwhile, you need to be sure whether your partner outshines you or not. When you assume things may go wrong and when you feel things may go partially right but when you surely realize that your partner always outperforms you, then you get clarity about how to act further to balance the fluctuations of your relationship.
The term 'outshine' comes into the picture of a romantic relationship when one person in a couple feels cornered, left out, and less appreciated by the world because of one's romantic partner. This could happen among couples who have different backgrounds and even in couples with similar backgrounds too. Social and societal image, financial status, career phase, individuality, personal charisma are the main reasons for a person to outshine one's partner unintentionally and purposely. (sometimes)
When two persons come together under a romantic bond, it takes a lot of stability for a couple in understanding each other but sometimes things may go out of hand unknowingly and some couples try to compete with each other in various possible ways to outshine each other knowingly. No matter how a person tries to outshine one's partner, at the end of the day, the entire relationship comes to the stake, and when that happens a couple gets split and left with no partner to outshine. Hence, one must realize that aspect and act accordingly to survive the relationship further.
Generally, this happens among couples who share similar career backgrounds or who share the same workspace. Career choices bring out the competitive spirit in any person and if that spirit exceeds its limits then a couple starts competing with each other to get into the limelight in one's profession. If one of them becomes successful in grabbing the attention regarding one's work, the other person may feel a bit jealous, cautious and conscious even though they support each other at one level.
If your partner does better than you in your workspace and if he/she gets loads of appreciation and attention from people, if you feel jealous, then it's fine and common. But observe whether your partner makes you feel jealous constantly, tries to suppress you and demean your work in front of other employees repeatedly and drag the office commitments to home just to make you feel awkwardly subordinative, then you must realize that your partner is purposely trying to outshine you.
In careers, a couple who belong to different professions may outshine each other unintentionally. This happens among couples in which one of them belongs to an industry that includes media coverage and the other one belongs to an industry that doesn't need attention from the media. For instance, if a celebrity model is in a relationship with a top-notch corporate business person, the limelight always turns towards the person who faces the camera even though both of them do equally better in their respective industries. Sometimes, the attention from people may influence a person to assume, feel and face the reality of one's outshining partner, even though the other person has no such intention.
Personal charisma comes in the forms of ancestral backgrounds, fame out of one's commitments to society, and most importantly one's whole personality. It's not at all wrong to have an appealing personality so that people love you as a person unconditionally. But sometimes due to this excessive attention, your loved ones may feel inferior, left out, and left behind, which indeed makes your partner feel that you outshine him/her. Even though it's an assumption from your side, sadly it gets visible as a bitter reality to your partner. So, you must realize that you unknowingly outshine your partner with your personality. This also happens when an extrovert and introvert commit as a couple. Without any doubt, extroverts always outshine their introvert partners in front of society.
Performance matters but outperforming behavior may cause some serious damage to one's romantic relationship. Some people are born overperforming and multitasking personalities in their education, career, personal, psychological, emotional and even in financial aspects too. Speaking of money, earning capabilities should never compromise a person's relationship. Unfortunately, sometimes this happens among some couples who compare their earnings all the time, and their dependency on each other's contributions may lead a person to outshine one's partner. By default, some people who earn good money to lead their elegant lifestyle always try to dominate their partners in monetary terms so that they would get an image of the sole bread provider in society. This is toxic indeed even though they realize their outshining personality but it always offense their partners in many ways.
Financial backgrounds may affect a relationship. That elegant status in society, that elite image among friends and family, that rich lifestyle a person leads publicly always degrade one's partner in the eyes of society. This particular outshining scenario gets into the picture without the involvement of the couple based on public opinion regarding one person's financial status in a couple. Hence, a couple must realize it and ignore it to the core without letting people's opinions ruin the peace and harmony of their relationship instead of getting along with it.
If you understand your partner's outperforming personality as something that comes as a boon, then you shouldn't get affected unnecessarily and think that your partner outshines you. Similarly, if you and your partner belong to different backgrounds, you must understand how attention works. No matter what, at the end of the day you are a couple who know about each other inside out. Never let careers ruin your relationship.
If you work together in the same workspace, maintain the decorum of professional hierarchy and never carry it to your abodes. And if you feel it is too much for you to handle by witnessing your partner shining brighter than you or underperforming, then you should shift jobs and locations.
Most importantly, if you understand your partner's stability in the relationship and charisma of one's intelligence and smartness, then you don't have to feel that your partner outshines you but if he/she does it purposely, then confront, communicate and if things go wrong, cut yourself off from that toxic person. Simple!