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Things to know if you like to date gender-bending gays!

Bending the gender norms is one basic yet intensely evolving aspect that can be seen in the queer community where many queer people label themselves under the roof of non-binary regarding their gender identities. Being tagged as gays (sexual orientation), many homosexual men consider themselves as gender benders with various gender non-binary identities such as genderqueer, gender-neutral, androgynous, agender, etc. Professionally and personally, some gays get into the personalities of drag queens that spill extreme femininity by balancing out their masculinity. Have you ever dated a drag queen or an androgynous gay? If you are excited enough to explore this set of gays to date them or get into a serious relationship with them, you must know a few things to be well prepared.



  • These gay men know how to embrace both masculine and feminine sides properly. So ask them clearly regarding their pronouns, alter egos, drag queen names, and preferences to be referred to, during outdoors and indoors. Never conclude your assumptions without asking them how they want to be noticed, observed, and considered. Some gays are cool with any kind of pronouns but a few are particular according to their feminine and masculine personalities.


  • Overdoing is never a thing for non-binary gay men. They just do things and don't give a thought about how society accepts them because they do things according to their moods. If you want to date a genderqueer gay man, then you may expect him to dress up in a cute little dress and appear in front of you for a dinner date. So, get ready to be surprised by some unpredictable appearances and never consider it as overdoing or over-appreciating one's effeminate side. Sometimes these gay men dress up more macho than you. Never express shock, it turns them off.



  • Keep your curiosity in balancing mode instead of crossing the limitations of asking too many intimate and personal questions, at least on a first meet or date. Understanding the aspects of gender non-binary is a bit complicated thing especially to people who only know about the gender binary. Gender-bender gays are always out of the box because they don't restrict themselves to male and female scenarios of society. So, try to know, comprehend and perceive them instead of sounding desperate, critical, and judgmental.


  • Art runs in their blood and hence if you like to date any gender-neutral person or a drag queen or an androgynous gay, you need to have an artistic mind to understand their creativity in art. And if you react to them in any kind of art mode, there are high chances of impressing them easily. Being a drag queen is an art that includes every aspect of the glamour world be it fashion, hair, and makeup. So, try to get yourself educated a bit in the glamorous world if you want to get along with these gender-bending gay men.



  • They are flamboyant because of their extravagant personalities. They easily attract the eyes of society with their dressing codes, behavioral patterns, and personality traits. Hence, you need to be prepared to handle any kind of heated attention from people and gradually you get used to it but initially, you need to know how to deal with it gracefully instead of freaking out unnecessarily.


  • Most gender non-binary gay men are extrovert, loud, and outgoing. You don't have to change yourself for them to date them, but you surely need to understand that they can never change or tone down their personalities just because you are not comfortable. Hence, you need to know the most significant thing which is 'you should never try to restrict them in any possible way'. After all, coming out as gay and leading a non-binary lifestyle in society isn't that easy and after crossing many hurdles, none of these genderqueer, gender-neutral, androgynous gays rigid themselves.



  • These gay men are career-focused, goal-driven, and ambitious in many ways. You need to understand that even though drag queens are self-employed by doing shows and modeling, they too possess other things in mind to settle down in a good position in life. So, instead of just looking at the glamorous outer appearance, try to know their inner personalities and desires. In fact, this is how you must start a conversation with these gender-bending gay men to know the reality, their real sides, and the real scenario around them.



Like other gays in the gay community, these homosexual men also work the same way when it comes to lust and love, romance and relationship, commitments and responsibilities but these gender-bending gays are all about crushing the typical gender norms and flexing the capacity of gender binary by elevating the radar of various constraints of gender non-binary. It's quite exciting, engaging, evolving to date these gay men but you need to broaden your mindsets and open up yourself to appreciate them. They can be masculine and feminine and nothing and both and purely be themselves however they want. So, things become quite adventurous to be with these gay men! Why delay, when you have some cool dudes in the gay community to date?



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