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The sad feelings after having contented consensual sex!

How do you feel about sex? Does that word elevate your mood or make you feel a bit different and weird? Or else it excites you at first and ends you up in sadness in the end? How do measure your satisfaction levels of sex? Do you feel orgasmic or else do you fake your orgasms just to make your partner feel satisfied? How does your partner treat you in bed? How do you behave in bed? What are the feelings that run in your mind when you entwine your body with your partner? How do you feel when your partner gets inside of you physically? Do emotions play a prominent role in having sex with any person? A lot of questions right! Well, answer every single for yourself or else just confront these answers with your partners if you are in a relationship!


If you think sex is only physical, then you must be the dumb one. Even though you have sex with a random hooker, some kind of psychological factors and emotions involved in it. Of course, feeling horny, attracted and excited about having physical intimacy are included in those psychological factors which urge a person to have sex with another person and the same thing applies to masturbation too! You can't masturbate just like that for the sake of cleaning your genital loads. You must think about someone, you must feel elevated by seeing someone having sex on your smartphones or you must imagine your sexual fantasies. Every aspect has a psychological tendency which makes a person get into physical intimacy.


Exactly these psychological factors play a prominent role in making a person feel sad even though he/she experiences the utmost satisfaction out of sexual pleasures. And this is getting quite common these days. Generally, a person must feel elated and boosted up after having sex because of the physical intimacy act as one of the best stress relievers. But on the contrary for some people, it adds extra stress and makes them fall into depression and unknown sadness out of guilt, regret, fear, disgust, anger but not a disappointment. It's quite a different phenomenon that can be seen in both men and women. These are post-sex blues. Medically, this condition called Post-coital dysphoria.


Sexologists deal with this issue with too many people. It is getting more common but before going to the deeper level of this issue, a person can always try to control one's feelings by thinking and opening up about the issue. Because these sad feelings after sex can ruin your relationship with your partners. Think, why are you feeling sad after having such perfect sex with your partner? Do not slip into deep thoughts, just find out to clear the clouds in your head. Dig into your past experiences. Evaluate all your current experiences. Scrutinize, what are you looking for? Act slowly and never conclude, that you are sad. Always know the fine line difference between feeling sad and being sad. People who face these post-sex blues do not feel sad before having sexual intercourse. These people indeed feel excited and make every effort to satisfy and to fulfill their partners' sexual desires. They feel perfectly good during sex and they even enjoy and have pleasure out of it too. But after climaxing or even attaining an orgasm, the world suddenly turns upside down in their minds. They do not act weird, annoyed or it is not because of mood swings too. This is because of that hidden feeling which gets stuck in their minds and hearts. They either cry or fluff their heads on pillows, they make faces of sad and boring. And this may become a seed for the downfall of a relationship.


After having sex, normally people feel more open up or blush or feel relieved or may even feel great as if reaching cloud nine. Any person would expect his/her, partner, to be happy and look satisfied post-sex, if they have good contented sex with meaningful consent. Then imagine once, what your partner will think about you if you feel sad after such great sexual moments? Yes, any person may take it as sheer disappointment and indeed your partner may become sad after seeing you sad. He/she may think about his/her acts in bed and may even doubt themselves. Hence, they start asking you what might have gone wrong in your intimate relationship. Instead of struggling between your feelings and your partner, just talk to them. Have a meaningful and adult conversation. Open up how do you feel after sex. Make your partner understand, that he/she is never the reason behind your sadness. Until and unless you have sex with a person with consent or with lust or love, your partner can never be a reason for your sadness. So explain those hidden and unimaginable sad feelings.


Try to overcome them by being with your partner after having sex for more than half an hour. Practice cuddling and have that skin-to-skin touch and eye contact. You must feel being loved. You must treat yourself as a person, not as an object with sexual feelings. And observe the outcomes because these may help you strike off those post-sex blues. If your partner doesn't understand how you feel or show some negligence regarding your sad feelings, do not panic. A true partner will always be by your side no matter what. In the end, you need to deal with your issues individually with or without any person besides you.



Keep calm and deep breath. Consult a sexologist or a sex therapist and discuss your issues. Surely, you will be fine and back to the sexual track one day. Because post-sex blues can be faded away easily if you work on them properly!


#everydayqueerlife #towardslove #sadfeelings #relationships #lovelife #postsexblues


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