Is it still that person you were in love with?
Doing things absent-minded, carrying a fake smile, trying to be over participating, pretending to be over-enthusiastic, walking all alone for god knows how many miles, always doing things to appreciate yourself by tagging "me-time" on social media profiles but indeed not enjoying the moment you are spending with yourself, these are some of the most common things people do when they just can't get over a person they once loved the most?
Breakups are easy, but post-breakup phases are difficult and some of us react, way more than others and indeed more than our partners who have left us for good and bad reasons. So, during this phase, most of us behave a bit weirdly. It wouldn't be annoying only for others but also sometimes for ourselves too. Like the honeymoon phase of a relationship, there exists a survival phase after ending a romantic relationship. In this phase, a person tries hard to revive and survive the relationship. Some people get successfully back with each other by sorting out the differences between them and some of us successfully survive through this disastrous phase and gradually come out of it to step in the moving-on phase. After a lot of effort, a person becomes 40% successful in giving up the hopes of a relationship that he/she just broke with his/her partner. That means, the remaining 60% of the personality, craves for something out of that broken relationship just when a person steps into the moving-on phase. In this phase, a person may end up showing various colors of his personality to sub-consciously get back his/her partner. In the process of moving-on, people try to get back with their partners from doing some ridiculous things like spying on their exes, taking revenge, blackmailing, chasing behind, playing the victim card, continuously pinging or calling, trying to disturb all the time and many other stupid acts. Instead of showering love, we showcase hatred to our loved ones just to get them back to our lives. How stupid it is?
And there come to some people who completely accept what they have gone through in their relationships. These people, never mind being friends with their exes, giving suggestions and support, being in contact as if nothing has happened, try to remain in touch no matter what. Well, for your kind information, you do the same thing as the people who behave with utmost stupidity. Because, both the people in these two categories, do one thing in common; thinking about the person all time, they once loved. If you scrutinize your mind clearly, then you will get to know that you still stuck up with the person whom you left or the person who left you. Hundreds of blogs and thousands of motivational videos are available online which makes you feel good and help you come out of your broken relationship. But, in the end, it is you who must understand your personality and you have all the control to keep yourself calm and get out of that phase. It is easy to suggest you move on in life for better perspectives, but personally, it takes a lot of time for a person to take someone who you once loved the most, out of your life.
Imagine, yourself dumping a person like left-out shit because you don' want him/her in your life because of some toxicity in love or you are being a prick to choose someone over the person who loves you the most. Either way, you don't give a damn about that person. Strictly, you act like a stranger, you stop texting that person, you start ignoring the same person and in the end, you treat that person as your lost memory. When you don't want something in your life, you make endless efforts to get it out of your mind, heart, and life. This is the basic human psychology, no wants unwanted. For suppose, if you are a person who was treated as nothing by the person whom you loved the most, just step in the shoes of that person, who treat you as someone unwanted. You can completely understand how that person feels about you and it indeed gives you a self-awakening answer by letting you know where you stand in a person's life whom you are nothing but some unwanted left-out of love.
So, is it still the person you were in love with, always run in your mind and make you busy in killing your precious time? Is he/she the one, with whom you always wanted to share your whole life by being a bin of emotions? Don't you think that it is completely a high time for you to have a deep thought about it or the person whom you loved the most and from whom you are still expecting something though the bond has already broken? Do not go back to your ex if you think he/she doesn't deserve you. And please apply the same rule to that ex whom you can't get over so easily and still wanted to remain in touch or have some bond under any name other than love, just do not go back. Have some self-realization aspect in your life to understand your self-worth especially when someone treats you worthless being in their lives. Always remember one thing, if your relationship hasn't revived in the survival phase, then never think about giving it another shot, especially when you are already in the moving-on phase!
#everydayqueerlife #towardslove #breakups #relationships #lovelife