How to deal with the 'Whys' in your relationship?

Unlike whats, hows and whens, the whys always lead to endless questions instead of ending up with one answer. So, one must be cautious and conscious enough to deal with any such whys in one's relationship especially when the factor of doubt arises in a couple. Regardless of how deeply two individuals love each other under the commitment of being together; they must face some unpredictable and unmanageable situations in a relationship. If a couple faces such delicate and complex scenarios, whys appear by default in the search for an answer that puts an end to ripples in a relationship.

One why leads to another and that, in turn, leads to another, the chain extends until it reaches a point where two parties make peace with the answer but from the first why to the last answer, there are high chances for a couple to face too many whys. They may feel utmostly uncomfortable by expressing, supporting and managing their answers to make sure the other person understands and gets along with the situation. Unfortunately, some relationships may break off in the process of explaining those endless whys!

Questions come into the picture only when a couple lacks transparency with each other. If you and your partner get to know what you are up to in each other lives in every possible way by keeping up with each other's interests, issues and information, you can easily eliminate unnecessary questions. But, it doesn't mean questions have a bad influence on a relationship. They bring clarity and can take a couple out of confusion if two individuals ask each other the questions that bother them in any aspect.

What, When and How can furnish the perfect explanations with a crystal clear answer and often they are short and straight forwards but a 'Why' carries a whole untold story and wholesome reasons behind it. If a couple trusts each other in every possible way, whys don't appear but that's not how relationships work. They constantly test a couple's strength for a commitment and hence, various kinds of scenarios fall into one's romantic life that makes a couple feel insecure, doubtful, jealous, and unstable with each other. That's why the "Whys" can rule out the integral relationship.

Surprisingly, every Why carries a perfect answer, but it completely depends on a person whether to narrate the full story or hide the bits and pieces of it. Often the why from one partner gives an urge for the why from the other partner. For instance, if you ask your partner, why is he talking to some random person so closely, then your partner may counter you by asking why you are getting triggered unnecessarily. Slowly, the conversation goes from a discussion to a debate and ends with an argument. If both the partners are sane enough to analyze the unnecessary complications, then they may settle at one point by eradicating the negative effect and getting along with the positive side but if either one of the partners is a headstrong, unwilling, argumentative, egoistic and pessimistic, then there may arise a rupture in the relationship.

The only way to deal with such endless whys is to be patient enough. Yes, patience is the key when it comes to answering your partner in a way that there won't be any other question following up behind that one why. Of course, it is difficult to stop with one why but if you carry the best explanation for your partner's question that involves utmost clarity with the aspects of trust, love and affection towards surviving your relationship, then it becomes easier for you to deal with the whys in your relationship.

No one likes to wait because everyone likes to get answers back to back within no time to find clarity effortlessly. But life is a game we mere humans can never understand fully. Hence, to find purity, one must be pure enough to put their souls out for protecting their relationship from unbearable ruins. Sometimes it takes ages for a couple to know each other completely, yet there may lie some hidden mystery between them. At times it takes many years for a person to clarify a particular aspect to one's partner. Hence, waiting is the sole option for a person to obtain proper answers to all the whys regarding one's partner.

Now you may wonder, why do you have to wait for years and years to attain an answer from your partner especially when you constantly get bothered by that irking factor of your relationship. Adeptly, it depends on how you trust each other, how intensely your souls are entangled with each other, how deeply you want a relationship to strive further and forever, how strongly you believe that one day all your questions get answered and all your whys get disappeared with no regrets.

When you find your partner's actions wrong and you feel attacked or triggered or disappointed or disgusted or degraded or bothered about your existence in your relationship, always remember that you must accept the reality when you get to encounter the right intentions behind those wrong actions. Life tests you as a couple to know how strong your relationship is. If you get caught up with the whys, you may not enjoy your relationship further, instead invest yourself in making your partner pretty comfortable to extract the explanations for all those whys with patience and by waiting.