Half way between sexual and asexual...
Heterosexuality is the sexual orientation that is majorly accepted and distributed in this world among humankind. The queer culture has introduced the terms of homosexuality, bisexuality, transsexuality, and asexuality to the world which are now getting accepted world-wide and being recognized as one community together as LGBTQIA+ community. We all know this and many people happening to know about the queer culture through various awareness programs, pride parades, queer carnivals, and many more! There are some sub-classifications to all these orientations, and these are the ones that depend on the emotional constraint of a person. In addition to sexual attractions, emotional attractions also matter in these sub sexualities. Among them, sexuality, which is halfway between sexual and asexual is Demisexuality!
Have you heard about it? To clear the clouds, this particular sexuality is not a confined orientation to one group, tribe, or community people. The spectrum of this particular sexuality is between being partially sexual and partially asexual. Yes, a person who tags himself as demisexual swings between asexuality and other orientations. Because a demisexual is a person who doesn't possess any sexual attractions until and unless they established an emotional connection with someone. Hence, demisexuality is all about maintaining an emotional connection with one person, and then the sexual attractions come into the picture, towards that particular person!
Okay, is it you? If you don't feel like having sex until and unless you have emotional intimacy with a person, then you may be demisexual. You don't have to worry about your core sexual orientation. Being demisexual is a sub orientation of any sexuality. This means a straight female can also be a demisexual, likewise, transgenders too! Regardless of the main orientations of a person, if he/she/they want to work their romantic life by making an emotional connection first than anything else, then that person can be tagged as demisexual.
Just because a demisexual person doesn't feel like having sex with others, doesn't he/she is an asexual. Asexuality is all about not having sexual tendencies towards any person, but they make emotional connections. But demisexuality is having sex after making an emotional connection. Hence, demisexuals are half sexual and half asexual. Emotional constraints play a major role in this particular orientation. Without a seed of an emotional connection, demisexuals don't even think about moving further romantically and sexually.
This is why you encounter some people saying that they won't get physically engaged until they are emotionally engaged. There's nothing wrong about it. If you are gay and sexually active, the way how you hook up with others seem normal to you, similarly, not hooking up with people and not doing random one-night stands is normal to demisexuals. So, instead of pointing out at them as weird, annoying, people who are terrified of sex, try to understand the concept behind them and their sub orientation of demisexuality.
The emotional connection is not just a preference, but the major attribute, any demisexual looks for, in other people. A demisexual can be gay, bi, straight, trans who can get emotionally engaged with any other person in the same community. Though a heterosexual can be a demisexual, this particular orientation, belongs to the queer culture and this mostly comes under the umbrella orientation of Asexuality! You must understand the fact that asexuals can have sex and remain as asexual because of no sexual attractions. Yes, you can have sex without getting sexually attracted to a person! It isn't confusing at all if you understand the basic difference between sexual attractions and emotional connections!
Unlike asexuals, demisexuals have sexual tendencies, sexual fantasies, sexual fetishes, sexual attractions, and sexual behavior, but all these sexual commitments only boost up when they make an emotional connection with a person. If they don't emotionally get connected with you, they will never end up in your bed. And one more thing, they mostly try to make an emotional connection with one person and they never get into double-dating. Their way of dating is completely different, which includes emotions first, and then the romantic and sexual attractions!
If you manage to reach a demisexual person's heart halfway by making an emotional connection, then you can think about having sexual connections that make your relationship complete!
#everydayqueerlife #towardslove #sexualorientations #demisexuals #queerculture