This is the question that pops up in most of our minds when we get to know that some random person uses us (we queer people) as a sex toy and disappears as if nothing has ever happened. This isn't only about the erotic fantasies but also the emotional intimacies, financial help, mental support, and physical aid. One must not generalize the particular set of people in society, but a few people come under the roof of typical users who manage to get into the hearts and holes of queer people as part of their detoxification methods.
If someone approaches you with the idea of relieving one's mental stress by sleeping with you and act completely weird the next day, don't you feel bad for yourself? Indeed, you feel ashamed for being such an easy catch for someone who doesn't deserve even a single minute of your life. But, some of us still entertain such absurd and unbearable people.
A few bicurious and heterosexual people fall into this weird category of channelizing queer people as stress relievers. These people hardly value others' emotions and feelings and these are the ones who typically portray the queerphobic attributes in the outer world. In public, they demean you and privately they worship you. This kind of drastic change must not be encouraged by any queer person regardless of the materialistic pleasures.
They approach you with the word called "Love" to simply lure you towards fulfilling their lusty fantasies. If you fall for such silly emotions then your mental peace will be surely ruined. Practically, the emotion of love couldn't be built in just a few moments. It takes time for a person to understand, analyze and scrutinize every unique perspective to fall in love. It goes without saying, that love is not about calculations, but commitments must be definitely calculative, if not you can never lead a life together. So, if someone reaches you out with the concept of love, be smart enough to make moves that transport you on the right path instead of leading yourself towards darkness.
Queer people always get perceived as easy catches for sensual connections. And unfortunately, many queer people proving it right with various kinds of dating platforms and hookup sources. Hence, it is becoming effortless for these horny heterosexuals to pick up queer people at bars, restaurants, dance floors, and many random places. Especially, these drunken heterosexuals, straight people who enjoy sexual fantasies and desires to sleep with queer people, bicurious people who always get excited to explore their curiosity in getting physically engaged with queer people, never leave an opportunity to showcase their desperate, hypocrite and needy behavior.
Queer allies never take advantage of playing with the feelings of queer people. They always support, encourage, and admire the emotions and existence of the queer crowd, no matter what. They are not queerphobic. They hang out with queer people like they do with other straight people. They are not judgmental, and they unconditionally spread love, unlike these heterosexuals who are opportunistic and always try to get into the pants of every queer person they encounter.
So, being a queer person, you must know the difference between people who support you and people who seek you sensually but horrify you with their egocentric behavior. If you accidentally or purposely sleep with someone who showers love in bed but behaves completely different outside of bed moments, then you must confront that person and teach that person a perfect life lesson, that he or she should never think about exploiting any queer person's life.
It is completely up to you if you want to spend some sensual time or romantic time with someone whom you know that he or she won't be available when you need him or her the most. Especially people who are married, bicurious, drunken souls, drug addicts, people who unleash their queer sides only when no one else sees them or when they are totally sloshed out and don't have a bare minimum idea of what they are up to. It's your choice but before making a choice, think twice about where your position lies after sex and how you get prioritized after giving what the other person desire. This will give you a reality check and make you understand the real world.
We queer people, aren't and shouldn't be the sensual channels of detoxification to any person including our partners. Period.